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This is one of the best things I did when my kids were born
When most people prepare for a newborn, they’re focused on baby names, sleep routines, and diapers. As a child life specialist, therapist, and mom of two, I did one other thing early on: I created an email address for each of my kids and started writing to them long before they’d be able to read any of my messages. It’s a time capsule, and one day, they’ll be glad it exists.
It was practical to secure email addresses using their names before they were taken. But I also knew the deeper value. Having worked with families facing illness, grief, and loss, I’ve seen how children treasure keepsakes and words that preserve connection.
When parents are reminded of life’s fragility, they often seek ways to capture memories, share guidance, and support their children — even if they can’t be there for every moment. In my work, I see this daily, which shapes how I parent: I don’t wait for hard moments; I prepare for them.
These inboxes have become a way to build a legacy, a living collection of love, advice, and stories my kids can carry with them. Over time, it’s also surprised me by becoming a kind of journal outlet for myself.
When I write to my kids
There are no rules. You can make this practice your own. I tend to write:
On birthdays
Every year, I send an email on or around their birthday. Sometimes it’s long, sometimes short and sweet.
This year I’m writing something like: “Today you’re 3. You chose a Minnie Mouse birthday with your favorite color, green. You are fierce, full of words, and love to dance. I can’t wait to see who you become, and I love every moment you greet me with a big smile in the morning.”
At silly and special moments
I like to jot down quick notes when I want to capture something small but meaningful — the way my kids say a certain phrase, a silly moment we shared, or something that surprised me. Often it starts with, “Things I want to remember…” or “I love the way you…”
One email I wrote says: “I never want to forget the way you call your Chicago Bears blanket your ‘gummy bear blanket.’”
When my daughter eventually starts saying it correctly, I know I’ll suddenly miss it — and notice how quickly she’s growing and changing. These little snapshots help me preserve the ordinary magic of childhood, and sometimes I’ll even attach a photo alongside the words.
During difficult moments
Parenting isn’t just about the highlight reel. I write when things are difficult, too. It helps me process my feelings and shows my children that love remains steady even in struggle.
Recently I wrote: “Your fierce personality has been testing my limits lately, but I keep reminding myself you’ll use it for good one day. You push limits. You stand tall. You fight for what you want — all things I’ll one day admire. At night, I sneak into your room and whisper how much I love you. Even when it’s hard, it’s still so fun. I hope you feel it, too.”
When they’ll get their emails
When I picture how my children might one day receive these notes, a few possibilities come to mind. I might share it on a milestone birthday, like turning 18, or during life transitions such as graduating high school or college.
Of course, I hope to live a long, healthy life and see my children grow into adults who eventually take care of me. I don’t write these emails out of fear, but out of love and an awareness of how important it is to capture memories, connection, and joy.
But if life throws a curveball and tragedy strikes, I know that at any time I’ll be able to give them an inbox filled with reminders that they were always seen, always known, and always cherished.
No matter the timing, they’ll know my love is steady and my words are always with them.
Want to try it yourself?
Create a simple email address for your child. Whether they are in infancy or in school, it’s never too late to start.
Then send one personal, simple note. Describe who they are today, saying a little bit about their personality and interests. Jot down what you love about them and what your hopes are for them.
From there, set reminders on your phone or calendar around birthdays, holidays, and other milestones or transitions.
Try not to overthink it. You don’t need to be a writer. Just make it honest and make it yours. One day, it’ll be theirs.
Kelsey Mora is Certified Child Life Specialist and Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor who provides custom support, guidance, and resources to parents, families, and communities impacted by medical conditions, trauma, grief, and everyday life stress. She is a private practice owner, mom of two, the creator and author of The Method Workbooks, and the Chief Clinical Officer of the nonprofit organization Pickles Group.
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